on the contrary, I hate who steals my solitude without, in exchange offering me true company.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
This outfit is again inspired by the Orient, with Berber facial tattoos (harquus) and a long vintage 70's dress.
I layered a few items for a more nostalgic effect. Underneath I am wearing a cream chiffon dress. I felt the little vest gives it an even more exotic vibe.
And if you'd like here is something I posted on Instagram:
Even though I have years of experience breastfeeding, Trystan's health issues posed a new challenge. After a quick natural birth (after a C-Section in 2011) I was able to nurse him right away. The nurse took him for a check up and after some time came back without him, telling me he isn't breathing well and in the ICU getting treatment for a lung infection. Needless to say I spent all night awake, my third night without sleep after being in labor for 2 nights at home. When I first got to see him he was hooked up to machines in an incubator. The nurses told me I can't nurse him because he is too weak. They had been giving him formula. When I asked about pumping breastmilk they said I likely won't have any but I asked to give it a try. Thanks to nursing a toddler through pregnancy I was able to pump enough breastmilk. I was then allowed to hold him for the first time since birth and asked if I could try to latch him on to the breast. Again I was told he will be too weak to nurse and needs to supplement but I could give it a try. He nursed like a champ so we agreed I would feed him first and then we would supplement with pumped breastmilk. However after the next feed he was full and not taking a bottle. The nurses decided to weigh him before and after a feed to see how much he takes in and he drank much more than he needed to! 😁 So despite being on antibiotics still he was "allowed" to be breastfed only and move into the room with me. Upstairs the nurses were baffled everytime that an ICU baby on antibiotics was "allowed" to be breastfed only (they usually give formula) and put me to the test often by requesting to weigh him. But he only gained and did not even lose birth weight 😊. Sadly we stood at the hospital longer because of his jaundice and again I was told he will be too weak to nurse bc of his jaundice being so bad, but he wasn't. Then he had to do photo-therapy and again I was faced with formula bc the nurses believed I could not pump enough. They even gave him a bottle without asking me. So I said alright how many bottles of breastmilk do you need? After a few minutes I came back with 3 and asked if they wanted more. Everyone was baffled at how much milk I had and I was too since last time I did not have enough and took Fenugreek for years. The nurses now seemed more positive about breastfeeding and supported me. When the jaundice levels were last measured everyone stood around us to see if they had dropped and cheered because after weeks we could finally go home. Our last challenge was acid reflux that had us in the hospital again. Many reflux babys don't nurse enough but Trystan fought through it too. Of course he was fussy, just like he was sleepy on antibiotics and with jaundice. It took more effort to feed him but it wasn't impossible. For some time he would wake every 10 to 30 mins. at night because of pain and had to co-sleep reclined but with probiotics he improved and now at 2 months he has hardly any reflux and (co-)sleeps well at night. No reclining needed.
It was a difficult time, at times the lack of sleep had me hallucinate and caused vision problems, and the ribs I broke in late pregnancy were aching due to him wanting to be held all day for comfort. Long story short, I just wanted to say babys with health issues can be exclusively breastfed even when hospital staff does not think so. I am very happy that my milk supply is doing so well these days. You may remember that last pregnancy I had Hashimotos and a Pituitary Tumor and quit meds to be able to breastfeed. I have since healed, had a med free pregnancy and a natural birth also thanks to extended breastfeeding* which kept my prolaktin levels stable all these years and had the tumor shrinking 💪
*Plus diet, natural remedies